Mobile jokes services

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I'm a comedy writer, with too much time on my hands and too many one-liners without a home. Adopt them.  You want puns? Done(s). Tweets? Sweet(s). Topical jokes? You get the idea(s). For a gig, I will write you original jokes, in your style or mine. 1 gig   =   2 jokes 2 gigs =   5 jokes 3 gigs =   9 jokes 4 gigs = 12 jokes You either tell me exactly what you're looking for (e.g., a holiday pun and a political tweet, five jokes you can tell your mother, etc.) or opt for a grab-bag of whatever comedy headspace I'm in at the time of your order. Check out the gig extras if you're looking for longer-form comedy: toasts, roasts, speeches, sketches, etc. I'm an equal-opportunity humorist.

HARMLESS JOKES FOR KIDS (AND ADULTS TOO!)Ideal content for websites, apps, eBooks and live performers None are repeated and all are of high quality BRONZE: 2,800 knock-knock jokes SILVER: 2,000 kids jokes plus 2,800 knock-knock jokes GOLD: Get over 10,000 funny kids jokes that are categorized into: 1,200 Animals jokes, 380 Bug jokes, 2,700 Scary / Halloween jokes, 2,800 knock-knock jokes and 3,250 random kids jokes Jokes and Answers are together in column A Ideal for apps and websites For Commercial and Home Use. Save yourself days and weeks of work writing and accumulating lines with this gig, and use what you need for whatever reason. I believe none are repeated. These jokes are easy to manipulate and create your own joke books or humor websites, or use them in Apps - just 250 jokes are enough for each app! PLEASE CHECK OUT MY OTHER GIGS FOR SIMILAR GIGS FOR JOKES AND TRIVIA / QUIZ CONTENT You may use these jokes as you see fit, but you cannot resell them as their collections in Excel or CSV. Remember you can randomize the Excel rows with =RAND() and then reorder as you wish to differentiate from other buyers. Or reorder by number of characters using =LEN(A1)

I'm offering over 10,000 quality jokes across 6 Microsoft Word files.  Four of these files have jokes organised by length - 15, 30, 60 and 90 seconds long.  Very useful.  Plus witty phrases, one-liners and hilarious jokes about the Police!

The second gig contains 6,500 further quality jokes across 4 collections, and a bonus Word file of Stupid Laws around the world, notably in American States.  

These jokes are easy to manipulate and create your own joke books or humor websites, or just to impress friends and colleagues with your wonderful jokes, including posting any on Facebook!

You may use these jokes as you see fit, but you cannot resell them as their collections.
Thank you.

I am a comedy writer with 10 years experience. A $5 basic gig can get you your choice of the following (or contact me for a custom gig):

• Stand-up comedy joke writing (2 jokes)
• Comedy Roasts (5 jokes)
• Online Humor Content (100 words)
• One liners (3-5)
• Speech writing (will add 1-2 jokes to your speech)
• Slogans and Tag Lines (3-5 ideas)
• Funny Headlines for Content (3-5 headlines)

I can write material for any purpose and on any topic for you to use however you'd like.

I will write you five original short-form jokes in whatever format you want. Standup, tweets, roast jokes, weird stuff, late-night style, satirical headlines, etc. I can write clean or dirty, weird or normal. You pick the premise (please send me a brief description if it's not intuitive, I don't have time to learn astrophysics for your research lab's holiday party). Note: I won't write jokes for standup comedians. I've only had bad experiences with this. Three days is not long enough to learn your voice, and those jokes take months of stage time to perfect. Alternatively, I will write up a single short comedic speech/newsletter/bio. Is your yearly family update getting kinda stale? Uncle Chris to the rescue. You need an acceptance speech for your Employee of the Month award at Subway #18402 in Boise? Say no more. I have sold jokes to Funny or Die, IFC, The Rich Eisen Show, McSweeney's, Mobcrush, LifeNoggin, Meh, and more. I will deliver the jokes in a single PDF document. I'm looking forward to working with you!

I will write custom stand-up comedy jokes based on any topic you may need.

I can also proof your jokes and improve them if you have already started to write!

I will give you collection of funny jokes. this database has more than 40000 records.  I can promise you that each record is unique. No duplicate, no hoax. Once you get it, there will be no need to look for more jokes. I will deliver it to you on sql, csv, doc or txt format.

If u pay i will send you 20 the best jokes on the world and u will search for more...:) has to shoot from laughter. Trust will be paid by you.

Hi there! I will write hilarious comedy skits for your Instagram, Facebook, Tik Tok or YouTube. If you want your videos to go viral, I can hook you up with some great ideas that'll be very catchy, funny and relatable. The plot will be well-structured with great punchlines. I will also write:Stand up jokes.Comedic monologue. Funny speech.Funny captions or Blog post.Jokes are a great way to get attention because after a long hard day, all we need is a little cheering up. If you think your existing material is boring, I will review it and Add suitable jokes and Punchlines to it. It is my top priority to deliver you the BEST QUALITY CONTENT. The work will be hundred percent ORIGINAL and UNIQUE. NOTE: I would really appreciate if you can contact me before you place the order. Shoot me a message, let's talk business.

Over 4000 Jokes Compiled!
This is a collection of jokes that will make you laugh! Everyone loves to laugh. You can use this whatever you want! Read it, share it or scream it out!

Updates!
May 2015

• Added 3 Books

March 2015

• Added 4 Books
• Added Reader's Digest

August 2014

• Added 5 Books

July 2014

• Added Marriage Lines

December 2013

• Added 1 Book

Especially made for : cherryconnew